The Caretaker

Following the resignation of Fabio Capello as manager of the England football team earlier this week, it has emerged today that the FA are giving serious consideration to the possibility of appointing a caretaker coach to lead the English team to the Euro 2012 tournament this summer.

With bookmakers' favourite Harry Redknapp unlikey to accept a part-time role and despite the FA's announcement that Stuart "Psycho" Pierce will take charge of England's friendly against Holland later this month, this blog can exclusively reveal that the man the FA now want to lead England’s Euro 2012 is none other than Arnold Rimmer lookalike, Stuart Lancaster.

Lancaster is currently England Rugby’s interim head coach but, unless results in this year’s Six Nations dictate otherwise, is unlikely to be offered a permanent position by the RFU. Insiders at the FA, however, confirm that they have been very much impressed by Lancaster’s “back to basics” approach and believe that his no-nonsense style would help transform the fortunes of England’s overpaid and pampered footballers as well as curb any off-field excesses.

Lancaster is said to be intrigued by the prospect and already has plans to select the Euro 2012 squad largely from seasoned pros from League 2 and the current England Under 16 squad, hold a pre-tournament training camp on Ilkley Moor and commission motivational presentations from John Prescott, the Archbishop of Canterbury and Mike Tindall.